The “F” Word

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There is this great lyric by Emilie Sandè:

“You have a heart as loud as Lions, so why let your voice be tamed”

I love this. The Lion – king of the jungle. The loudest roar of the animal kingdom. No fear. Ready for any challenge that presents itself. Never to back away from an enemy but holds ground – steadfast and courageous.

I would love for this to be me. To still roar loudly no matter of what was in front of me. Always on alert to protect the right order. Fearing nothing or at least not letting it alter my resolve.

But us humans, we scare easily. It’s a good thing we are at the top of the food chain otherwise we would be in trouble!

We may have a heart as loud as lions but we struggle with the roaring part. Fear of backlash, fear of rejection, fear of persecution, fear of looking silly, fear of not being heard.

A deep ingrained fear of doing – anything. Speaking, acting, doing. We all have it. Do you remember being in school, when you would raise your hand to answer a question and then it would rise up? That immediate unease – what if I give the wrong answer, I would seem dumb. What will everyone think of what I say or how I speak? Fear.

That awful little four letter F word that has probably be holding the world back since….well forever.

Fear is such a big obstacle. It’s the enemy’s greatest weapon and our biggest barrier to anything good. Fear can cripple our dreams and cripple anything good in the world. Fear tames our roar.

Loosing someone is a harsh jolt to reality. We live ONCE. ONCE! and it is never long enough. Even when its been 30 years – it feels like it’s over to soon. Since loosing Mum, I have decided that no little F word is going to let me not LIVE! Not ROAR.

Here are my suggestions to break down fear and let your roar rip!

1. Write down what fear is holding you back from.

2. Tell fear to “suck it” and do it anyway.

Maybe people will think you are silly or a try hard or wrong. But you definitely don’t need that kind of negativity in your life so ignore them. Those people are generally either caught in fear themselves or jealous, or both. Greatness lies in doing. Nothing, zip, zero would have ever happened in the world if we all succumbed to fear. Dreaming and fearing is a viscous cycle – one the enemy wants to see you caught in so you don’t do anything amazing.

You have a heart as loud as lions, so WHY let your voice be tamed?

Listen to yo’ Mumma!

So you know those things your mum says to you and you think to yourself “yes mum”, “I know mum” but never really take them on board or put them in the nagging box..

Well turns out, for me at lease, I think the mums are on to something.  I was recently thinking about things Mum used to say to me and now that she isn’t here to say it anymore, I have come to realise just how good advice it was. Little gems that really are the foundations to living simply and graciously. Here are a few of my favourite! 

Mind your Ps & Qs

Really there is no excuse for bad manners. Everyone has been taught at some point in their lives to use good manners. Not only does it display your character to others but is also a sign of respect. That you respect this person enough to be polite – whether its deserved or not. Working in PR I often find the use of profoundly good manners (“oh thank you so much” or “please would you mind”) will also work in your favour if seeking something at short notice or to get your brand chosen above others! When dealing with negative people, no one can get mad at you when you are being sickly sweet. So make sure you “mind your Ps & Qs” – it goes a long way.

If you haven’t got anything nice to say – don’t say anything!

Mean things will always come back to you, and while it reflects more on your character than the person you are talking to or about, meanness is just not cool. We are human and sometimes what we think just comes out – I have been guilty of this on more than one occasion and I shudder to think about the impression I left on the person I was talking to or about.  Not to mention the damage it can do to their confidence &/or self esteem. Things we say to others can stick with them for a long time after we have moved on. We don’t know the damage we can do with our words – whether they are intended or not. So choose your words carefully – loose lips sink ships & cause rifts!

Make your bed everyday 

I remember giving my mum so much grief because she insisted on not only having a made bed every day but one worthy of the Home Beautiful cover. She owned more quilt covers and throw pillows than every Pillow Talk in Brisbane. Everyday she would diligently make it – cushions and all, before heading off to work or whatever the days activity was. Why? At the time I thought it was a pride thing but since having my own home and family I think it was because not matter what did or didn’t happen during the day, come bed time she could slide into fresh sheets and enjoy some time in calmness. Now having kids of my own – I do feel more “on top” of everything when I get into a made bed (not that is happens super regularly – sorry mummy) .

And never leave the house with at least a little blush and lippy.

Some would say its vanity or pride but I always feel 100 times better leaving the house on the days I have put make-up on, than on the days I haven’t. I call it confidence. For me, its about having an outwards display of how I feel about myself on the inside, as opposed to an outwards display of how I want people to see me as being on the inside. I think there is a distinct difference. Mum was the same – a bit of tinted moisturiser, blush and always lippy was all you need – she would say.

I’ll end with a quote I have seen floating around the Insta-sphere that I just love, which sums up my view just nicely I reckon! 

In case I never said it when you were here – thanks Mum! You really did know best.

The List

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Last week I talked about the concept of “capsule wardrobes” a possible solution for my too small a wardrobe for too many clothes problem. In my efforts to apply this theory, I have discovered a few little tid bits along my journey so I thought I would share a few for those of you playing at home.

First of all, I have to tell you about this great blog I stumbled across, Un-Fancy. Its totally dedicated to capsule wardrobes! With tips, tricks and ideas, the girl who writes it, Caroline, has really thrown herself into the concept. Although she is in the US so the seasons are opposite to ours, she has a couple of years worth of posts so there is always something relevant. I got a tonne of ideas from it.

In theory, there should be 37 items to a capsule wardrobe but I have gone with 39 – however since the only difference between an autumn and a winter wardrobe in Queensland is the addition of a trench coat, my capsule wardrobe will be servicing both seasons so I figured I could go slightly over the allocated amount!

So where to start – The List.  I used some of the principles mentioned on Un-Fancy to first create my wardrobe on paper. I used the Rule of Three and took inspiration from some of the items in her “Fall” wardrobe.

I wrote all of these down as one big list. Then I did – The Audit. What items did I already have. Keeping in mind to have one basic item, one classic item and one statement. Surprisingly I did have quite a bit and they fitted in well together. But for anyone starting from scratch I would keep everything pretty simple/neutral and then add personality through jewellery and accessories (which don’t count towards your 37 pieces by the way! Few!)

Then I identified what items I needed. I guess ideally, it’s best to do this a few weeks before the new season starts so you have a chance to hit up sales and buy things out of season when they can tend to be a bit cheaper.

Now that I have my wardrobe list done and my shopping list ready – its time for the hard part. The Clean Out! I know it’s the whole point of the process, to de-clutter and minimise but it will be hard getting rid of things I paid good money for. However I think planning my wardrobes in advance and knowing exactly what I need to buy will save me money and time in the long run, plus since I am restricted to only 37 items I will only buy things I truly love!

xoxo Tunns.

P.S If you are playing along in Brisbane or Toowoomba and looking for a good cause to donate your rejected clothes to, Teen Challenge is looking for donations for an upcoming garage sale. Contact me if you would like more details :)

It’s just too darn small!

Having just moved into our very first (well that we are living in) home and coming to the inevitable conclusion that my new wardrobe is waaaaaaaaaay smaller than my last one, I think it is time for me to start practicing the less is more theory.

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They say when you don’t have to think about what you’re going to wear, agonising over which shoes, do those earrings go, is this shirt a little too see through? Not only do your mornings become more efficient but so does your brain! Which is now free to think about important things – like whether I should have a pendant light or a flush mount in the entryway!

Lucky for me, I just stumbled across these simple concepts put together by Apartment Therapy – designed to embrace the less is more concept but still maintaining style!

Anyone care to join me in the challenge? I know for a fact some of my readers could do with employing these few tricks! Yes Belinda – I am referring to you xoxo

Braving a new life

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Since mid last year I have had the privilege of working for an amazing not for profit organisation. It is one that has a true heart to see young people embark on a new way of life. Irrespective of where they’ve come from or what they have done, this organisation is dedicated to seeing them make good choices and get a fresh start in life.

Since Loving the World is about stepping outside of our own lives and looking into what is happening around our country and the globe, I thought it would be remiss of me not to take the opportunity to share with you all the hard, gritty work this organisation does and the transformations that take place because of their unwavering commitment.

The organisation I am talking about it Teen Challenge QLD. A group of people who are beyond passionate about seeing the drug epidemic over in Australia and the lives of an entire generation saved.

Their rehabilitation centres in Toowoomba take kids from as young as 16 that have some form of addiction (and what is truly saddening is we get enquires for kids younger than that). Whether it’s alcohol and drugs, self harming, eating disorders, gaming or a range of other addictive behaviour – there is always a common thread.  Most go to Teen Challenge with depression, anxiety or other forms of mental illness that have usually been triggered by circumstances outside of their control.

This is what truly breaks my heart about some of the stories I have heard since being at Teen Challenge. Stories of abuse, neglect, broken homes and broken families. A lot of people will shudder when they think of drug addicts. Often the perception is that those with drug addictions have simple made some poor choices, and while in a sense this is true – so often circumstance or environment can hinder them from learning the difference between a good choice and a bad one.

Teen Challenge is an organisation that takes loving to a whole new level. I am blown away daily by the passion and commitment I see, not just from those who work directly with the students but from the support staff, those who deal with the families, volunteers and the amazing Executive Director – Jo Hobbs. Apart from being an amazing woman of God, she is a strong faithful leader. Committed to the cause – Teen Challenge isn’t just a job for her, it’s a calling. The same can be said for all that work there. A mandate each one willing picks up everyday, knowing that their dedication, perseverance and faithfulness will see change in the lives of those that come to Teen Challenge.

The first thing students get told when they come through the doors is that they are loved. They have a purpose. Sadly, this is the first time some have heard this. The staff that work directly with them are amazing. Loving them regardless of what they have done in the past but all the while giving them strict boundaries. One of the most important thing kids need to feel secure.

Its real and gritty, and its amazing to see kids after they have been through the program, come out on a much stronger path. Making better choices for their lives, feeling like they could achieve anything.  Family relationships restored, a career path in the pipeline. When you think about what the alternative would have been, the outcome is just mind blowing. They have purpose for their life and great dreams of what they want to achieve – there are no words to describe the impact being made.

For me, its a constant inspiration. Some students have gone on to do some great things. Past students now work at Teen Challenge themselves, using their experiences to help others. If they can rise form their circumstances, learn from their past and brave a new life for themselves, couldn’t we all?